growing pains

Some people would do anything to look younger, turn back the clock, and even create a clock that goes backwards (hehe, just watched Benjamin Buttons, which was actually a really good one I must say... it’s randomly awesome!)... but for me, I appreciate the natural ability of growing older .

It’s like a gift from our Creator. It’s as simple as time. Addition in time = addition in age = addition in maturity.

Now, the thing is... something happened not too long ago to me. it had something to do with how I look as a 21-year-old girl who is stuck in the middle between graduation and having a steady job that will be able to provide for her chances of surviving in the world of money and materialism. This not-a-girl; not-yet-a-woman situation makes me feel so uneasy, I can’t wait to break out of it.

And as I was happily enjoying my almost-fulfilling retreat, a major catastrophe took place that sunny afternoon. I didn’t know what lay before as I stepped into that Korean saloon in Melbourne’s china town with Tim and Angeline.

I indicated with my fingers the length I want for my fringe. She said to close my eyes in Korean accent so she can trim my hair that flowed down my forehead, over my eyes. And when I opened my eyes, my heart fell to my feet. It’s so short it’s not classified as fringe!
Angeline, if u’re reading this, it got worse after that day. I thought it was fine after the cut, so I was ok then. Accepted the new look instantly. But when I got back, reality sank in. It was so bad I wish the tiles in the toilet floor would crack open and I’ll get sucked into a whirlpool of self-pity and disappointment.

Now I’m stuck in this stressful feeling. How do I go out and meet people, find a job, get applications for PR done etc? How how how? My self confident just ripped out from me instantly.

Tim says its cute. And we had a really good laugh and good scream in the car and in Sugar Bowl. But really... how long will it grow to a desirable length so I can feel pretty again?

Now that I look 10 years younger, I feel ‘uuuggghhhh’ about growing up. Bills to pay, rent coming every fortnight, car breaking down, job hunting disappointments, freaking expensive PR fees... and what did I say again? I appreciate the natural ability of growing old. Yes... that’s it. I love life. Come on adult issues!!! Bring it on!